Did I dream it?

Rare is the moment when I am literally stopped in my tracks while perusing a store. But on this day, in the year of our Lord 2013, I spied what might just be the most hideous piece of furniture upon which one has ever laid eyes.

I think I inadvertently shoved someone out of the way as I rushed over to take a closer look at this thing.

Come to think of it, I may have scaled a few pieces of furniture that were in the way as well.

No time to go around.

Ugliness seen.

Must. Document.

"Oh, Henry, no.. Don't sit your mother there for dinner. My strawberry chair is just for honoured guests. Quick, get one of those old lawn chairs from the garage for her to use. She'll be fine and she can set her glass of sherry on the arm. Win-win."

Might be a little dust on the cotton, it's just one of those things that gets sweeter with time.

File this one under "too good to throw away" (TGTTA): 20(and I'm being conservative here)-year-old multi-coloured cotton balls, still in original (though broken and, might I add, snaggy?) container.

Let's all just pause and think about the thought process of the person who decided to donate these to the thrift store.

Thrifty Update: And Then There Was One

I'd like a plaster Norseman head, yes, but I only require one. What kind of person needs two!?


Edited to add: I feel I should reference the original post featuring this guy.

As the old saying goes...

Don't just sit there like a bunch of fruit pits on a log.

The decorative moss is a nice touch.

Also, the internal struggle that comes with decluttering one's house continues. Apparently this was deemed too good for the trash bin.

Not your grandma's doily (or maybe it was, and this is how she rolled, in which case, what were trips to grandma's like!?)

And here we have a swan doily. A black swan doily, at that. It is all kinds of creepy, if you ask me. Well made, but creepy. (Might I draw your attention to the eyes that I'm sure glow in the dark, and the razor sharp blood sucking beaks?) 

How and where does one display one of these in their torture chamber house?

You've gotta admit, though, that's some damn fine craftsmanship.

They're biding their time, waiting to ensnare some poor dopey child into their pineapple lace net of doom.

What... just... what!?

Having just had a garage sale with my sisters-in-law, I fully understand that you just put stuff out there, slap a price sticker on it and hope for the best. If it sells, you make a buck or two. If it doesn't, it goes off to the thrift store or the trash. Some of it's wacky, some of it's funny. But you try. No harm done.

Just stop and take it all in, would ya? She's crying. There's a silhouetted couple in a lovers' embrace on wind-blown autumnal leaves. Five dollars.

That said, there are some things - case in point, this picture - that I might be too embarrassed to include in my garage sale. Where people come to my house. And know that I owned this. And owned it for what seems like a good 30+ years before deciding to part with it. 

After climbing all those stairs? What do YOU think?

"Not tonight dear. The atomospheric pressure is 101.4 kilopascals and falling. Whoops, sorry, I was reading the barometer by mistake. I mean no, I would rather watch the late late show."

"Now about that mink" - that's right, bribe him for an old timey fur coat.

Is that a carpet sweeper in your hand?

Or are you just happy to see me?

He ain't heavy...

For a week now I have been scratching my head over how these two plaster noggins came into existence. AND how they came to be donated to a thrift store.

"Well, my dream to make bed knobs out of craggy old Norseman faces has fizzled. That was a miscalculation... But surely someone else can make good use out of these two and their blasé demeanor. Buck up, lads. Someone will find a use for you yet!"

Shellshocked

My that's a lovely... one of those.

She sells secondhand seashells.

There is no end to the wide array of seashell "art" out there in thrift stores, just waiting to be gawked at and made fun of admired and appreciated for the hours of painstaking labour that went into making it so atrocious breathtaking.

FrankenLamp

Well, that's one way to modernize a vintage lamp...

Fashion meets function.

...or to burn your retinas while sitting down to read your latest issue of Cat Fancy.